That's my nephew featured on the webpage of his school....He is the kid on the right of the girl with the hat, backrow of course!
*beaming with pride*
Matu-batu
*still grinning*
Friday, 31 July 2009
Tuesday, 28 July 2009
in the pantry
i'm in the pantry with my colleagues...
one's just got pregnant! woohoo...congrats! One is so slim altho she eats like a pig!! Hehe...no la..she eats very well and is so slim still... One's son just got married and she is so happy that her daughter in law cleans her son's room. Haha. One only has fruits for lunch and another is an amazingly youthful person, altho she looks like a graceful punjabi aunty and had tickets to rihanna's concert! Lol.
The little little learn about people are actually important. I think these are the things that gives familiarity, not where they live, or what's their jobs... Your know the general
info you obtain in 'cliche' conversations...
In communication, there are 5 levels, I dun think I can recall all of them, but I do remember cliche level, where it's more of a hi and bye thing, and the greatest is peak level where words are not necessary. Makes you think of aliens huh? And I do not know why for some weird reason, whenever they cast aliens in movies, they must always tilt their heads when staring into your eyes when trying to communicate or pierce into you brains.... I mean that is how we communicate, but do you think aliens would have the same type of body language?
excuse the randomness...massive migraine... wanted to doze for a while....but when u hv tthe internet.....lol..
gotta go...ciaoz..
one's just got pregnant! woohoo...congrats! One is so slim altho she eats like a pig!! Hehe...no la..she eats very well and is so slim still... One's son just got married and she is so happy that her daughter in law cleans her son's room. Haha. One only has fruits for lunch and another is an amazingly youthful person, altho she looks like a graceful punjabi aunty and had tickets to rihanna's concert! Lol.
The little little learn about people are actually important. I think these are the things that gives familiarity, not where they live, or what's their jobs... Your know the general
info you obtain in 'cliche' conversations...
In communication, there are 5 levels, I dun think I can recall all of them, but I do remember cliche level, where it's more of a hi and bye thing, and the greatest is peak level where words are not necessary. Makes you think of aliens huh? And I do not know why for some weird reason, whenever they cast aliens in movies, they must always tilt their heads when staring into your eyes when trying to communicate or pierce into you brains.... I mean that is how we communicate, but do you think aliens would have the same type of body language?
excuse the randomness...massive migraine... wanted to doze for a while....but when u hv tthe internet.....lol..
gotta go...ciaoz..
Sunday, 26 July 2009
Blessed with good friends
I went to meet Kamini for tea today. Wore a new top from Nichii and 3/4 jeans wit my heels...my typical outfit. we were just enjoying a nice conversation in Bangsar Village, and Kamini asks me to go clubbing with her n her sister and a tall guy (the tall guy part was supposed to bait me la. Lol)
So I had nothing better to do, agreed la. But we needed to fix my outfit... My blue top was fine, but I needed either proper jeans or a skirt. Since Kamini was gonna wear her skirt tonight, we decided we'd do some last minute shopping.
I found her!! My one and a half 'jengkal' long skirt!! :) Got it from little.black.book! I looked good! :p Had a good time at Mumbai Se....and now, need to sleep....Nights people...
So I had nothing better to do, agreed la. But we needed to fix my outfit... My blue top was fine, but I needed either proper jeans or a skirt. Since Kamini was gonna wear her skirt tonight, we decided we'd do some last minute shopping.
I found her!! My one and a half 'jengkal' long skirt!! :) Got it from little.black.book! I looked good! :p Had a good time at Mumbai Se....and now, need to sleep....Nights people...
Saturday, 25 July 2009
Good weekend ahead..
Well, it's payday!! Woohoo!!
Twas a tough month, but worth it! I've gained all that self-confidence lost after the accident. Things are into better fit into perspective, and I'm more in control of emotions.
In the struggle of being perfect, I guess, there is a beauty to imperfection ...it is what makes us human. You know, it is so easy to have all this theory by the back of ur hand, but to believe it and practice it is a whole different matter.
Somebody told me this urban legend of a magazine that tried to digitally create this perfect face by fixing the 'best' features together, but it turned really hideous. I do not know how far true this story is, but I might believe that if that was truly attempted, the result would not be the face of an angel. The last month, I think I have come to terms with my weaknesses, many they are, and accepted them. When I spoke to an old acquaintance, he believed that trying to be perfect puts yourself in a corner. He shared how trying to impress his superiors send him into panic attacks. Well, it does sound extreme, but the truth is, it happens. I remember when I was back to work after the accident, I wanted to prove that I could learn what I had to in record time of a week (what others took a month), but it only sent me into deeper depressing-ish thoughts and emotions. The results undid everything else.
My father used to think that mind could overcome everything, a true believer of mind over matter. The example that my father was has given me the courage to dare dream of the impossible. Although, I would not say everything I dared try was healthy, but he has given me the belief through his own life as an example that the mind can overcome anything. When I jog, and it hurts so bad, I really talk to myself in the head, telling me why I want to do this so badly, be it for better stamina, for that date, or to release that built up anger inside. Today, I knew I was gonna suck real bad at work, being thrown into the phlebotomy bench. I had no choice but to just do it. And I have been told I think too much and over analyse everything, so today, I just got out of bed, dressed up, had my breakfast and walked into the specimen collection room. And I survived, barely scratched.
It borders indifference...there's a thin line being just doin it and having indifference...though it was hard when the baby I pricked would not stop bleeding...but yea, I had no choice. I just told myself, that me screwing up would not have been my fault, because:
a) i've been only trained for 2 weeks officially
b) all that bullshit my colleagues have been saying about having the initiative to learn on your own borders impossibility as when you're at a bench, they expect you to HELP all you can, to your dying breath (especially true with female superiors...I think that many women are poor leaders because they cannot dissociate emotions from mental decisions. I'm sorry to be so harsh on women in general, but I must say that in many cases it is true. However,m the better female leaders, make fantastic ones..). So that just means do not leave us when we need you.
People are selfish. when your leaders are not well trained to create a spirit of teamwork within a working premise, people think me, myself and I. I hate selfish people. My brother, once did a little internet googling on the church of Satan. He shared most of it sounded like a whole load of crap, except this on website. It's teaching was simple. It just said, you noe, we aren't extreme. We just think that you ought to think about yourself first. In all that you do, think of your needs and wants first. Oh it's not all that bad, we just think that you should all you can to get whatever it is that YOU want. Simple. Think about it, my Christian friends...Reflect on Christ's teachings and compare it to just looking out for yourself, your family and your loved ones....Putting your happiness first...the scry part is that, yea...it does not sound too wrong, now does it...That I believe, is truly the work of the fallen one.
Then I remembered the recent exco planning camp held by the CSS students of UKM. I was asked to give a talk on self-esteem, and how surprised I was to find out that a priest once blatantly said that self esteem is very un Christian. I found it hard t swallow, but after reading his argument, I must say, looking a it from that point of view, it made sense. Look at it, Jesus teaches humility, self esteem says you're the best! Jesus teaches following God's will, self esteem says you create your own future. Jesus says in God's time, self esteem says the world is yours! That is why, when you work for secular organisations, when it is about your personal developement....ONLY personaal developement...without developing others in return, you get burnt out. That is why Christian leadership is so beautiful. I can give everything up to work for good Church course, but I cant give it all up for something I want in a career, or in society. Which explains why I have so much potential in developing myself, but I do not, in the corporate sense.
All I really wanna do is formate the youth. I really wanna help teenagers grow..first spiritually and everything else will fal into place. unfortunately, someone, it is not yet time. And it is so contradicting, that some of the people I am interested in do not share the same views... We wish to find that half to complete us...as some would say, the two being separated at the creation of the world, hence we spend or whose lives looking for our other half, with outrnavels as a reminder of that separation (I think Greek mythology). But in all truth, finding that other person who'd share the sae humour, hence the same outlook on life, is very difficult Most of us make do with what we find, and cling on to it as if it were our very lives. Some let it go, and spend the rest of their loves regretting the decision. But it is such a waste of energy. Yes, a partner, a spouse would be a lovely thing, but single adulthood is also a vocation. Sometimes, our lives are ,meant to be devoted to something greater. Hard to swallow, but it is true. In the meantime, make yourself happy, but the indifference in me would be quick to say, if you THINK finding a random girl/guy to cling on to makes u happy, den so be it. just dun regret your choice.
Choices are made all the time. People fail to be accountable to the choices made. I gave up a Shell scholarship. I gave up a Star scholarship. Do I look less happy? I am very happy. Why? because I told myself, that when I gave this or that up, I really gave it up. I made myself promise that I would be responsible for my actions and would do my best to obtain what I wanted....to work with the health industry and study microbes. I decided to never look back when I gave up work offers from Taylors, Clinipath and Pantai...reason because I knew they were good offers, and losing some is part and parcel of taking risks. but the up point that I have as Christian is my faith that God will walk me through.
The richness of the Catholic faith is amazing. Reading through the documents from the second vatican council is truly an eye-opener. It shames me to know that in many ways, we are not giving God that reverence as we ought to.Look at how the hebrews bowed and worshiped Yahweh. Just because Jesus is our mediator, it doesnt mean He is less God for He is fully God and fully Man (not some herculean hybrid). And we still ought to bow down in that much of reverence to Him. Yet in Church we still see mini skirts and spaghetti strap blouses. I never knew I'd see the day I'd think this way, but I have come to understand, but the experience in Rome changed me for good.
I could go on writing my random long trail of thoughts, but I do have to meet Kamini in Bangsar, and I do need a shower. So till then, have a good weekend.
Twas a tough month, but worth it! I've gained all that self-confidence lost after the accident. Things are into better fit into perspective, and I'm more in control of emotions.
In the struggle of being perfect, I guess, there is a beauty to imperfection ...it is what makes us human. You know, it is so easy to have all this theory by the back of ur hand, but to believe it and practice it is a whole different matter.
Somebody told me this urban legend of a magazine that tried to digitally create this perfect face by fixing the 'best' features together, but it turned really hideous. I do not know how far true this story is, but I might believe that if that was truly attempted, the result would not be the face of an angel. The last month, I think I have come to terms with my weaknesses, many they are, and accepted them. When I spoke to an old acquaintance, he believed that trying to be perfect puts yourself in a corner. He shared how trying to impress his superiors send him into panic attacks. Well, it does sound extreme, but the truth is, it happens. I remember when I was back to work after the accident, I wanted to prove that I could learn what I had to in record time of a week (what others took a month), but it only sent me into deeper depressing-ish thoughts and emotions. The results undid everything else.
My father used to think that mind could overcome everything, a true believer of mind over matter. The example that my father was has given me the courage to dare dream of the impossible. Although, I would not say everything I dared try was healthy, but he has given me the belief through his own life as an example that the mind can overcome anything. When I jog, and it hurts so bad, I really talk to myself in the head, telling me why I want to do this so badly, be it for better stamina, for that date, or to release that built up anger inside. Today, I knew I was gonna suck real bad at work, being thrown into the phlebotomy bench. I had no choice but to just do it. And I have been told I think too much and over analyse everything, so today, I just got out of bed, dressed up, had my breakfast and walked into the specimen collection room. And I survived, barely scratched.
It borders indifference...there's a thin line being just doin it and having indifference...though it was hard when the baby I pricked would not stop bleeding...but yea, I had no choice. I just told myself, that me screwing up would not have been my fault, because:
a) i've been only trained for 2 weeks officially
b) all that bullshit my colleagues have been saying about having the initiative to learn on your own borders impossibility as when you're at a bench, they expect you to HELP all you can, to your dying breath (especially true with female superiors...I think that many women are poor leaders because they cannot dissociate emotions from mental decisions. I'm sorry to be so harsh on women in general, but I must say that in many cases it is true. However,m the better female leaders, make fantastic ones..). So that just means do not leave us when we need you.
People are selfish. when your leaders are not well trained to create a spirit of teamwork within a working premise, people think me, myself and I. I hate selfish people. My brother, once did a little internet googling on the church of Satan. He shared most of it sounded like a whole load of crap, except this on website. It's teaching was simple. It just said, you noe, we aren't extreme. We just think that you ought to think about yourself first. In all that you do, think of your needs and wants first. Oh it's not all that bad, we just think that you should all you can to get whatever it is that YOU want. Simple. Think about it, my Christian friends...Reflect on Christ's teachings and compare it to just looking out for yourself, your family and your loved ones....Putting your happiness first...the scry part is that, yea...it does not sound too wrong, now does it...That I believe, is truly the work of the fallen one.
Then I remembered the recent exco planning camp held by the CSS students of UKM. I was asked to give a talk on self-esteem, and how surprised I was to find out that a priest once blatantly said that self esteem is very un Christian. I found it hard t swallow, but after reading his argument, I must say, looking a it from that point of view, it made sense. Look at it, Jesus teaches humility, self esteem says you're the best! Jesus teaches following God's will, self esteem says you create your own future. Jesus says in God's time, self esteem says the world is yours! That is why, when you work for secular organisations, when it is about your personal developement....ONLY personaal developement...without developing others in return, you get burnt out. That is why Christian leadership is so beautiful. I can give everything up to work for good Church course, but I cant give it all up for something I want in a career, or in society. Which explains why I have so much potential in developing myself, but I do not, in the corporate sense.
All I really wanna do is formate the youth. I really wanna help teenagers grow..first spiritually and everything else will fal into place. unfortunately, someone, it is not yet time. And it is so contradicting, that some of the people I am interested in do not share the same views... We wish to find that half to complete us...as some would say, the two being separated at the creation of the world, hence we spend or whose lives looking for our other half, with outrnavels as a reminder of that separation (I think Greek mythology). But in all truth, finding that other person who'd share the sae humour, hence the same outlook on life, is very difficult Most of us make do with what we find, and cling on to it as if it were our very lives. Some let it go, and spend the rest of their loves regretting the decision. But it is such a waste of energy. Yes, a partner, a spouse would be a lovely thing, but single adulthood is also a vocation. Sometimes, our lives are ,meant to be devoted to something greater. Hard to swallow, but it is true. In the meantime, make yourself happy, but the indifference in me would be quick to say, if you THINK finding a random girl/guy to cling on to makes u happy, den so be it. just dun regret your choice.
Choices are made all the time. People fail to be accountable to the choices made. I gave up a Shell scholarship. I gave up a Star scholarship. Do I look less happy? I am very happy. Why? because I told myself, that when I gave this or that up, I really gave it up. I made myself promise that I would be responsible for my actions and would do my best to obtain what I wanted....to work with the health industry and study microbes. I decided to never look back when I gave up work offers from Taylors, Clinipath and Pantai...reason because I knew they were good offers, and losing some is part and parcel of taking risks. but the up point that I have as Christian is my faith that God will walk me through.
The richness of the Catholic faith is amazing. Reading through the documents from the second vatican council is truly an eye-opener. It shames me to know that in many ways, we are not giving God that reverence as we ought to.Look at how the hebrews bowed and worshiped Yahweh. Just because Jesus is our mediator, it doesnt mean He is less God for He is fully God and fully Man (not some herculean hybrid). And we still ought to bow down in that much of reverence to Him. Yet in Church we still see mini skirts and spaghetti strap blouses. I never knew I'd see the day I'd think this way, but I have come to understand, but the experience in Rome changed me for good.
I could go on writing my random long trail of thoughts, but I do have to meet Kamini in Bangsar, and I do need a shower. So till then, have a good weekend.
Tuesday, 14 July 2009
this is because JV said my blog has ceased to function
Hehe..
Updates eh?
First of all, I'm involved with a bunch of people hoping to form a choir that would serve bring Sacred Music back to Mass, as it is said in the Constitution of Sacred Liturgy, that sacred music is considered more holy in proportion and is more closely connected with the liturgical action. through the two meetings we have had so far, I have come to realize again the sacredness of Holy Mass...to be present in Mass is to be in the presence of Christ.. and how we have watered that down through our lives.. In reverence, hen sacred music would be the more appropriate music to be played in Holy Mass...Yet, coming from a background coloured with youth ministry and campus ministry, I find it very hard to swallow..Will need more time to discern and probably talk to more people about this. For the time being, understanding Sacrosanctum Concilium and reading the Musicam Sacram is very very beneficial, and we have also been practising Veni creator spiritus, pange linguae and pater noster. It's been great, cuz Ben Loh (the leader) is a qualified choir master. We are taught how to better our voice projection... and in addition to that, most chants are in Latin. So it's definitely interesting to me..
Then Helena from Penang has encouraged Jon to start a group guided by the book The Purpose Driven Life.
That would require teamwork, and already have a feeling dat one of them is not gonna be as committed as I would like her to be. But I hope that I am gravely wrong..... This group would hopefully be directed to write and develop a module, under Helena's guide, for school leavers. I have no idea why won't they use the YE. I have a feeling no one is ready to be challenged the way Jesus challenges people. Oh well...it's their prerogative... I am just searching for a place to serve and be happy serving.
Let's not even talk about the ex n his girlfriend.
Gave a session for the CSSUKM exco, and I did not wanna fake anything with her so i treated her civilly, and she started mopping and complaints she cant eat and all...Lord please help me figure this mess out. Why aren't I allowed to just stay away from people who continuously hurt me? Why are you testing me so? To see how much I love you? If I'm willing to torture myself for your work?
Why? Aih...
Updates eh?
First of all, I'm involved with a bunch of people hoping to form a choir that would serve bring Sacred Music back to Mass, as it is said in the Constitution of Sacred Liturgy, that sacred music is considered more holy in proportion and is more closely connected with the liturgical action. through the two meetings we have had so far, I have come to realize again the sacredness of Holy Mass...to be present in Mass is to be in the presence of Christ.. and how we have watered that down through our lives.. In reverence, hen sacred music would be the more appropriate music to be played in Holy Mass...Yet, coming from a background coloured with youth ministry and campus ministry, I find it very hard to swallow..Will need more time to discern and probably talk to more people about this. For the time being, understanding Sacrosanctum Concilium and reading the Musicam Sacram is very very beneficial, and we have also been practising Veni creator spiritus, pange linguae and pater noster. It's been great, cuz Ben Loh (the leader) is a qualified choir master. We are taught how to better our voice projection... and in addition to that, most chants are in Latin. So it's definitely interesting to me..
Then Helena from Penang has encouraged Jon to start a group guided by the book The Purpose Driven Life.
That would require teamwork, and already have a feeling dat one of them is not gonna be as committed as I would like her to be. But I hope that I am gravely wrong..... This group would hopefully be directed to write and develop a module, under Helena's guide, for school leavers. I have no idea why won't they use the YE. I have a feeling no one is ready to be challenged the way Jesus challenges people. Oh well...it's their prerogative... I am just searching for a place to serve and be happy serving.
Let's not even talk about the ex n his girlfriend.
Gave a session for the CSSUKM exco, and I did not wanna fake anything with her so i treated her civilly, and she started mopping and complaints she cant eat and all...Lord please help me figure this mess out. Why aren't I allowed to just stay away from people who continuously hurt me? Why are you testing me so? To see how much I love you? If I'm willing to torture myself for your work?
Why? Aih...
Sunday, 5 July 2009
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