Happy Birthday Anyi

The cemetery was absolutely beautiful. I never knew lalang would bo so pleasing to the eye. The lalang were knee high, between every tombstone. And these fresh green lalang were topped with a spread of tiny light pink flowers that grew in spindle-like bundles. So as far as the eye could see, it was tall green grass, light pink flowers, with the top of the tombstones and crosses interspearsed around...oh yes, with a really soft breeze..it was about to drizzle, so it was really cloudy and windy.

It is a waste that the only digital camera my family has is with my sister in Australia...Nevermind..working soon...*grins*

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After Mass in St Francis Xavier's Church, we rushed off to visit Anyi for his birthday. Anyi is a word that means "sir" in an Indian dialect. That was what we called my dad, and what my dad called my grandad and so on and so forth.

Anyi passed away when I was 9, due to the nurses negligence. He was undergoing chemotheraphy in the KL GH. On the day he was supposed to come home, he broke a vessel in his nose blowing too hard. The nurse, in panic, mede him lie down and put a few ice cubes into his mouth. He choked on it, and passed away.

My family never sued the hospital, nor the nurse. Nothing could bring my father back. We did not want to cause any more pain to anyone else.

It took us five years before we started functioning a little more normally. But, I guess none of us were ever the same again. Still, it is funny, more heart-warming to see a bit of Anyi in all of us. Mama never liked dogs, but she is kind to Bruno because of how Anyi used to care for the dogs. Koko developed Anyi's reading habits, and his likes for the supernatural, the unexplained, and religion. Premko has taken to Anyi's involvement in church, Anyi's generous heart, never keeping a cent to himself. Chea-chea (jie-jie) has Anyi's love for the family, nurturing, prayerful and decerning. Me? I apparently took to his temper (Haha), his sociable nature, and his particular liking to parties and late night out with his friends. :P

Anyi was an all-rounder. He was brilliant at school. Proud student of the St Francis Institution, Malacca! (All Thomas boys are to be schooled there!) He was offered a scholarship to Cambridge at 17, engineering, which was turned down by my over-bearing grandmother..(A fortune teller told her that her only son was going to marry a non-Indian...worried he'd take a Mat Salleh wife, she did not allow him to leave her side...manala tau...He married my chinese mom!! LOL). Then he went on to serve the army, and at 20 was the best sharp-shooter, and was offered to study in Sandhurst. Yet again, grandmother refused to let him go.

But Anyi made it on his own. He went on to be the first batch of students to take the TESL diploma (back then done only in Singapore) and went on to be an English lecturer.

Anyi would be appalled at the standards of my English if he were alive, but I think I am not too bad (la). :)

My dad was a chain smoker, finishing 4-5 packets of cigarettes a day. With sheer will-power, he stopped smoking, cold turkey, and never picked it up ever again. When he was in his 30s he was pretty out of shape, due to the smoking. He went on to pick up jogging. At first, he couldnt jog the distance between two lamp posts! A few years later, my father was jogging 16 miles!

Anyi was a fantastic actor and singer and dancer. :) He was part of the Malacca Theater Group, alongside Godpa (Charles Chase-Currier, Tim's grandpa), Uncle Kenny Silver, Mr & Mrs Gifford, and so many more.. Anyi started the first marching band in Malacca with the Pay Fong students. He wrote so many plays and his poems, well, I've never seen the likes. It is a waste that Anyi never went on to write, humble as he was, he always thought he did not have enough facts to write. And he was trully a well read man.

My father was one of the pioneer "be-frienders" counsellors. He would spend hours on the phone counselling strangers and friends as well.

My father a complete gentleman. He was gentle with all women. He would never "play" a girl or lead her on. He would never allow a woman to carry anything if he were there. He was patient with aunties and grnadmas, and he was loving to all little girls. He called all the guy friends my siblings had "sons" and would always lend a listening ear.

The day he died, St Francis Xavier's Church was packed to the brim. I saw people form all walks of life, coming to his funeral. He really did touch the lives of so many. I have never met a man better or the equal of my father. there will never be one. And I am so proud to be the little girl of such a man. My mom always said, that all the blessings bestowed on us today is because of all the good deeds my father did during his life time.

I love you, Anyi, and I will always miss you. There is no one else like you.

Happy Birthday!